chenta watever

06/mac/2009
salam

do u believe in destiny?
of coz as a muslim dat is a must
but sometym wen i tend to think out of the orbit
i think of how will i met my destined men
i keep searching for dem but still i can't find any
maybe sumthing wrong wif me*inferior feeling*...
back in school i do believe dat i wud only be in a relationship wif d 1 i wud wanna married wif
but now..if i start counting mayb its too much men dat i wanna married wif*sight*
i can be in a relationship without haven't love him as much as it supposed(weido)
cuz i can learn and fallen in love easily but dats is a problems too
cuz i won't last long...d feeling i had wud fade away as i start learn their flaw
its not like i'm a perfectionist but it juz naturally wud happend wen i start a relationship
dats y the longgest relationship i ever had is wen i were 17(highshcool)
i think on my 2nd year at uni my old reationship last 3month or less(but dis 1 i got sowhhh many people against it)
as far as me n him is different race and religion.but dat time i really do love him(now no more huh ~.~)
i'm not regreted any..not wen i'm wif him n not after i'm breaking up. i juz really2 sad for wat he done but
mayb its my fault for can't compromise n endure the obstacle. After all dats wat relationship all about ain't it?
we even talk about married.silly huh. history was history..juz sometime i dun wanna let it go
(wat am i) even i'm d one who breaking it up.
but i do can love some1 for a long time hehe(its onesided though).
mayb its start wif admiration but his care grow my love for him. but d bad part he had gf.
i even love him afta knowing he had gf(pathetic). dat juz how love all about huh*sight*
but i did not wish dat i wud be his gf or so watever(nada,nill,nehi,porfavor,no)
i keep it inside but some part of me sometime wanna let him know how i felt about him.
like i said not becoz i wanna b "serangga perosak" in his relationship, it just my wishful hope.
i felt its not fair for me to fall in love wif him without he even know(i think)
i give hime hint sometime though. naa~ mayb i juz sud stop day dreaming n focusing in my life.
cuz dis onesided love is not going anywhere*long sight*
i sud wrap the feeling up in alluminium foil thighly n keep in in -98 degree freezer(wat a metaphor) and open it up
to my grandson wen i wanna give teletaller. my merepek is going too long but i still wanna go on.
its my page..sure i can say watever i want ain't it?
where i stop...urmm i sud try to put love not as my 1stperiority anymore but building my carrier 1st
(words from a going to be graduater ceh)
When i have everything in life,love can find me later on(or it is not applicable to women??).
after all everyone have their destinied one ain't it?? i still 22 anyway.
so i wanna give it a try n mourn for a little longger and my status wud be single but UNAVAILABLE??!
watever as long as every1 hepi (`~.~)//

~later people
regars